Wanting a Relationship To Fix Your Life

When approaching this issue with my clients, I always asked them “if you meet the person of your dreams, would you feel confident enough to walk up to them and speak with them”?

And they all say “NO”. Why? Because even though they want to be in a relationship, they don’t even feel like they are deserving of one, especially with the person of their dreams. They did not feel they had much to offer and did not feel that person would like them very much.

But the underlining issue is that they did not like themselves. They had low self-esteem and didn’t feel confident. Not that they were not beautiful people, but they didn’t believe they were beautiful inside or out.

If you want to be in a relationship, work on being that person you are seeking. Put yourself in the position where you are able to offer the qualities you are looking for.

Work on yourself so that you can increase your self-esteem and confidence so that when you do see that person, you are not afraid to converse with them. You want to feel like you have something to offer.

Honestly, it is unfair to expect someone else to fix your life. One person can’t be everything to you all the time. If you approach a relationship like this, it is guaranteed you will get disappointed. You can not depend on another person to maintain your happiness.

Happiness is a personal thang. This is something that comes from within yourself. If you are not happy without a relationship, you will likely not be happy in a relationship.

Relationships can get stressful and requires patience and effort. If you are already unhappy, how can you help maintain a healthy relationship, especially if you are depending on the relationship to provide that happiness for you.

Only you can “make” you happy or “fix” your life. It’s not easy but with a little step here or there you can definitely accomplish it. I have faith in you!

Also, start by finding people who share your interest. Even if it’s an online Facebook group. People can’t see how awesome you are if you hide.

What can you use besides a relationship to “fix your life”? Comment below?

Published by Asha Griffin, MA, LPC, NCC, BC-TMH

I am Asha Griffin, a licensed professional counselor in South Carolina. I am dedicated to improving the mental health of others and helping them to "tend to their gardens". My goal is to inspire people in finding better balance in their lives.

Leave a Reply