Identity Confusion: Will you ever know yourself?

This topic is inspired by a teenager wondering when they will ever fully know themselves.

Some of us believe we will just wake up one day and have life all figured out. We hold out for that day where we are just so sure about everything and we know who we are; that’s that, nothing left to consider or explore.

We could just go out in the world with the most confidence because we are no longer confused about who we are so there is no need to question our identity. NOT!

I don’t think anyone ever stop feeling confused about their identity.

Yes, sometimes we are more confident and self-aware but it does not last always and this is why.

We are always growing. With every life experience we change. We go through so many life transitions that can possibly give us a new outlook on life and an increase in self-awareness.

For instance some major life transitions are moving to a new location, starting college, getting married, starting a new career, becoming a parent, breaking-up with someone, getting a divorce, ending friendship, being diagnosed with a condition, losing a loved one and so on.

At some point people begin to question themselves when new situations arise that they have never dealt with before or when circumstances are difficult to handle.

We have a habit of defining ourselves based on what is going on our lives. If we perceive it as good, we get motivated and more confident about ourselves. We feel secure in who we are because everything seems to be working out for the better.

When things look bad, this is when we begin to question ourselves and not feel so confident in the identity we created for ourselves.

This is my experience. With every new season and new chapter in my life, I discover a new me. The process is stressful, but I always end up learning something new about myself and my capabilities as person.

We are more powerful and resilient than we think. We just have to remember that no matter what we encounter, we are capable of adapting. When you look at it on a bigger scale, it helps you to see loss of identify as temporary and opportunity for growth.

So don’t worry, we are always becoming better version of ourselves. We sometimes might not be sure about our identify, but we always have the power to create a new one that serves us better.

So the take away is, have confidence that you will make it through and that is all you need.

Do you think you know yourself? What would be helpful to know for someone who is struggling to find themselves? Comment Below!

Published by Asha Griffin, MA, LPC, NCC, BC-TMH

I am Asha Griffin, a licensed professional counselor in South Carolina. I am dedicated to improving the mental health of others and helping them to "tend to their gardens". My goal is to inspire people in finding better balance in their lives.

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